Sunday, December 30, 2012

why are many seniors so drepressed/angry?!

why are many seniors so drepressed/angry?!
good morning
just before i take my sunday walk, i say hello and Report my dream. it IS sunday and you know what dream *this* means?!
[i have this here dream nearly every Sunday morning!]
[I live in a senior home of about 130 people.]
the dream begins as i am filling out endless forms for to get health insurance.
[seniors over 65 have to fill out several sections of a medicare package of gov. medical help.]
endless seeing ladies behind desks to fill out forums.
then to the Meat of the dream. an endless traveling on a road that it is where i have very little money and am facing running out before the Journey ends! then i will be homeless and have to sleep on the ground or in a box or in a homeless shelter. it is known that my trip is longer than i have money for.
---end of dream.
the usual every-sunday dream, 

  here on what is 'supposed" to be the quietest time of the week, the most "spiritual" morning conditions for a good dream, i get this dream.
of *course* for most seniors, such a peaceful quiet morning IS the time for such dreams as now they can think and ponder.
---no husband or wife anymore. is going down.
...I am Alone and *lonely*.
...everything that i once loved is going away.
...crime is getting worse by the day, how long before gangs barge in *here* to rob and rape me?! is not paying much attention to seniors.
....cost of living goes up by the day and my income is fixed.
....all my few friends are now in the nursing home.
....they are cheapening everything so that anything is now a shadow of itself.
....I failed to do my childhood dreams.
....i cannot see well anymore.
...i cannot hear well anymore.
...i cannot walk well anymore.
...i cannot taste foods well anymore.
..i have diabetes...i have high blood pressure/heart conditions.
...half of my time is spent going to doctors.
....most of the people around me are too gossupy. relatives have abandoned me.
....i have incontinence and stink up every single chair i sit in.
....i cannot understand a thing about the modern age.
....i only get junk mail, now.
...I am Getting Old.
...I am going to die soon and I Am Afraid.
its almost,  like....." those who are not like this, in feelings, are either in denial or so thick in the head that They Just Do Not Know!"!!
so this here Freestone lies there in bed, soaking up all of these vibes, vibes that saturate the very air.  the quieter the morning, the more these seniors tend to begin to think about their lives.
there is, of course, a Way Out, but tis the last thing that anything of education has taught them. and they would not belive it anyways as the physical world is what they want.
the spiritual life, for most, is a varient of Fundamentalist christianity!
[a true story]
freestone: i see that homeless bag lady sitting at the bus bench.
"oh, do you know that there is a good place for seniors to live, Goergia belle?".
lady: " l *lived* there once and i hated it"!
lady: first off, they put me on the second floor and
[with a HUGE angry staccato voice like of a machine gun spitting out bullets!
[she did not mean on the bed on the first floor.
she did not mean on a mattress lying on the floor.
she meant she must sleep *on the ground*!!]
her need for the contact with terra firma, is *ABSOLUTE*!!
"and secondly, there was too too too many people there"!!
she was *angry*. angry all of the time.
angry that society was not handing her the way she wanted.
angry that she got mucked up.
angry at God for putting her here.
angry at life.
she might see life as "everything is minus 40 degrees such that her ZERO of her own life is far far warmer than anything out there that would affect her.
what hope for her?
how could you thaw her out?
[bitter depressed old men and women are mostly made through life, and the process can begin even in childhood.]

Saturday, December 29, 2012

what lies in store for us all post dec 21st

hi all again.

[I posted this on a prophecy forum.  most of the people there are angry that "nothing happened"  at dec 21st!  So I posted this, my own "reply" as to what I think is the real meaning of 2012 age-roll-over.
My post was *not* well received!   They want Real Tangible Results!
maybe many want Release from their troubled lives.
maybe they do not want to hear, "you have to do most of the work"!]


this here freestone sees all the meltdowns of True Believers. of course many melt down as they see the solution in earth terms, not spiritual terms.
"nothing happened" they say.

well today i created an image as to what lies in store for us all.

we arrive in heaven, either by earth changes, or old age or the usual suspects.
there will be a kind of HUGE mountain there, the "new" heaven.
someone "outside" of this huge mountain will see this place as a huge peaked pyramid
of a mountain. on its side and from bottom to top, are "steps", flat areas arranged in no particular order. each such step is a world. some worlds are
as large as a county, some might be as large as a continent! from bottom to top, the higher one goes, the higher the vibration. the "better" that heaven world.

christ and his angels and master guides are at the top, they are the Managers.

you will live on this mountain for keeps. no more reincarnation back to earth unless for a few, a special Spirit-given and Guided mission is undertaken via free will choice.
there *might* be a 'reincarnation" of sorts: one goes up and down the steps, maybe going to a low world to work out karma and then up to a higher place to heal, learn, live, then back down again. but these "reincarnations" are all in the Spirit realms with spiritual laws, not natural laws!

and just what determines what first heaven-step you arrive at?
well...your Life! what kind of life did you live?!
like attracts like.

change you; change your world-to-come!

but some of us *want* darkness and bitterness! we have worked hard for this all of our lives!
thus we will, at first, get the world of that vibration.
[ i shudder at sensing a whole country made up of bitter old men!!] imagine 100 bitter old men, in a hall.

i said "at first", and i do say that, and for this is one of the reasons of my post.

something has Been Going On that few few new agers have really sensed, as they are not really "Jesus people"!
[Jesus. too too much Baggage comes with this, "religious abuse" is a Real counseling term!]
the Christ, then.
He was Krishna, maybe mr Q....Quicacotol of the Toltecs, and the other Avatars of the human race.

see...i Feel that there was, for years, a great Dispensation given from on high. a kind of "Second Coming", then. this dispensation penetrated nearly to the heart of near all incarnated souls.
this is what THE HARVEST means.
He will call them all to the new heaven, all at once or over a longer time, "death" is patient, in 60 years, most will Come!
"at first" the low level souls will have their bad-homes, there near the base of this mountain. but then soon He, the Christ, will begin to "draw" them upwards. as He now is in such a "bad" person's soul, the very soul will "want" to better itself, from within.

so the apples are picked, ripe or not, at the end of the age. the unripe apples will have a Place to finish up their ripenings.


difficulties in overcoming memes

 difficulties in overcoming memes.
I had something interesting happen last night.
i took a walk downstairs to stretch my legs and i talked to the security guard. he is unlike most such guards. he is a high level military retiree and very intelligent and then he spent years in law enforcement.
i talked about how many seniors are caught up in their bitter world.
he tells me, "yes they are set into their boxes, boxes that were made by all of their life. I was the military man and the law enforcement and i know this has affected my life in a way to flavor it. I see that"!
soon the talk got around to his warning me not to go outdoors after dark, "you *do* not know just what low-life prowls around after dark"!
then he told me of "just the other day" when at 2 am he gets off of work and on the way home, near but not in a bad neighboorhood he stops at a convenience store and some guy with a hood and loose jacket comes running up to him to ??? ask money/steal/harass him! the hooded man is angry and seems to be "confronted" by the presence of this still uniformed guard. "come to my car and i will show to you my piece" [gun]". as this guy went to his car, alone, the guard gets in his car and drives off.
then this guard says that nearly every one of these stores has such people hanging around and
"freestone, *you do NOT want to be out after dark*"!!
i left him with the phrase...." i guess the bitter old men and women are right! those who are NOT angry and bitter *just do not know what is really going on*"!
[he wins]
then later i got to thinking about what a guide wrote. he wrote about the "Lamenting angels"; these are angels who do the lamenting for the war dead, the lost souls, the die-to-early babies, etc.
I realized then that there are people who are Depressed from the very fist birth-moment and for every moment of their lives. when they die to go to work with these angels.
and yes, being a security guard with military back ground, that Box is as huge as the Universe and cannot ever be gotten out of! this guard will probably join the GUARD angels, those who watch over and protect other souls and institutions from low vibrations and souls!
---in other words. this is for Keeps, in a profound sense.
and today as i left my supper cafe and walked across the parking lot to the street to cross it, here comes at right angles , one of those guys"! one of the black homeless or "jail parolee"! he "jives" with me in a unfathomable way and he continues i do.
this is the first such guy i have had "cross my path" in several months!
*this* is the Power of this Inflection Meme!
Meme (pron.: /ˈmm/; meem)[1] is a term created by Richard Dawkins to describe a transmittable concept within his theory of culture. It can be defined as "an idea, behavior or style that spreads from person to person within a culture."[2] A meme acts as a unit for carrying cultural ideas, symbols or practices, which can be transmitted from one mind to another through writing, speech, gestures, rituals or other imitable phenomena. Supporters of the concept regard memes as cultural analogues to genes in that they self-replicate, mutate and respond to selective pressures.[3]
the danger of this meme is far far more dangerous than of any one robber or homeless crazyman!
for this is a soul-attitude that will attract all of these to one.
probably this guard has such an encounter at these stores several times within a month or three.
of course he sees this as "OBJECTIVE"! real. cannot be denied and proof of how bad things have gotten.
how can one "unsee" a white polar bear, when one is first seen?!
1 + 2 + 4 = 7. crime happens, harassment to strangers happen. read the news. the guard is confirmed in his beliefs. could he deny his eyes and senses?
if he runs into ten of these dudes in three months and escapes with only the harassment alone, he feels blessed.
[in new york city, some crazy woman got into bitching at a stranger on the subway platform and then she ran to him to push him off in front of a oncoming train! the second such event there in a month!]
ahhhh......the fatal flaw. he is self-confirmed. *how* would he "overcome" this?! would he have to visit 37,041 visits to a convenience store, at night, and not *one* such event to happen, to over-write this? and if just one encounter during this time were to happen, then it might take 6,368,038 more visits without an encounter.
the fatal flaw # 2
---he thinks these numbers of encounters is random and happens in equal measure to everyone!
his own confirmation brings the proof of the confirmation, to him, the wheel spins, the Loop between inner and outer, is always reinforced.
---the inner is always reflected and Proved, by the outer world.

Friday, December 28, 2012

a Good Morning

a Good Morning by freestone
a Good Morning, a photo by freestone on Flickr.

a Good Morning

yes a good morning for the New Year-to come. especially seeing we Passed by dec 21st, 2012!

a sunrise over Tallahassee, looking west. sort of ordinary, but a good photo to begin the new year with.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

some people do not like xmas!

ah, christmas.

my own tales from the front?
well i had hoped for a nice dream this morning. oh i had many all right , some of the "worst" dreams of the type where i am dreaming someone else's memories and experiences.   I seemed to be any number of homeless people with no money, no shelter and NO LIFE! that is, the clothes on their backs and that is all their lives, no friends, no relatives, no money, no homes, no future, no hopes, no pictures on the walls, no items from amazing life-events displayed, no real past either!  I would dream of one person, then move on to another...on and on.

i dwell on this dreams series a bit as this was "i was someone else's, all of these people, all utterly void of any life meanings and goods and money!".

the senior home people, where I live, people with No One for christmas!! How many will not even come down to the lobby, today? they will maybe even just lie there in bed for much of the day and just COOK in their sufferings!! i will never see them.  I was picking up their vibes, a number of seniors just laying awake all night long, Cooking in their miseries.

Here there are many happy seniors, in my westminster gardens, happy people leaving to be with their family for the day. But for some seniors here, there is No one.

for these people, xmas is a Final Judgement.

 society is so steeped in xmas

and if no family, it is not even that "society makes you feel that you are a nothing", it is that the individuals themselves buy into this. and i see this is not avoidable!

for most people, clan and family is all.

that is one reason why christmas is so huge and all-encompassing, for three months of the year.

after death, i suspect that for most family-orientated people in heaven, their heaven world is about 10 acres in size: the family area where everyone lives.

we have come a long ways. for 200,000+ years, the clan was all. when someone died, they were added to the list on the family alter and the soul of that person would "hover" right next to this alter and wait until a baby was conceived so that they would incarnate immediately to it, as "earth" is all the reality there is. in fact these souls sleep until the first bit of food is set upon the alter each meal and when the family sits down to eat, before anyone eats, a bit of food is left there and its etheric essence is eaten by the deceased souls and they are awake now for a few minutes. I discovered this as when i eat something, at the very first bite someone rushes over to interrupt my first taste! the memory is Ancient. that first bite goes to the souls of the dead and everyone has been through that Loop many many many times. so my first bite really *DOES* belong to the interrupter more than it should belong to me!!

and the meaning of the incarnation of the have him in your heart so to now live in his Memory and not have to reincarnate again, to avoid the second death.

about ten this morning i walked over to the episcopal church at the 10 am service time. i leaned up against the side door so that the perfumes, the colognes, the swinging censer, etc, would not get to me. I only stayed a few minutes as the fumes from the termite treatment began to bother me.

there was a nice hymn, a christmas carol. but the rest of the service was of a "Rote"! like most services. i am "Vaccinated" really good against church services as i was treated well, at my interlaken presbyterian church

[dutch reformed] with reverend Dykstra and his lectures on economy and yawn yawn....dry talks. he eventually quit to go to his true love: to be an accountant!

so i grew up with a LOT of dry dry churchology;  "no oil in the gearworks",

sermons and statements of faith and the like.

[i tend to like the pentecostal/charisma/ap mountain gospel music, there is life there!]

I do not take well to any speeches, i have found. in fact i am not a word person. Music and sounds is what moves me!!

so by 6 am or so, the poor seniors have finally slept and these dreams end.

this here freestone is treated like this a lot. many many of my dreams merely reflect the feelings of my residents. week in, week out.

take poor "Bill"! i sat with him at the lunch, he usually gobbles his food up in a minute and leaves before i sit down. but recently i talked with him for a few minutes.

his alcoholic father mistreated him. he has battle trauma from his military service. his son is also afgan battle shocked.

Bill talks in a depressed mono-tone.

I now sense more why. he has a right to be depressed!! in fact he nearly had to live in a mental institution due to this! if you were him, you would be depressed too!

I Felt him:

---a man is standing *precisely* at the South Pole. now tell him to walk a few yards but do NOT walk North!

ah....he cannot. every direction is north. this is like trying to help him out of his life-long depressions! *every* thought, every feeling, only leads "north"!

there IS a way out! it is to go Upwards from this south pole! this is where he has Jesus in his heart as a "mystical" experience, the Living Christ, the descent of the Dove and he is living in 24/7 partnership with the Christ.

[be aware there is no dogma or "baggage" with this Christ! one needs never to even enter a church!]

alas, he might need another ten incarnations or at least another 10 years, of just cooking in his depressions, first!

One can lead the horse to water but only the horse can reach for the water!

and then there are the families where a fist fight might break out, around the Christmas tree. some family members do not get along. period. you can sweeten them with all the christmas you want to, but your Sugar is nowheres sweet enough!


Monday, December 24, 2012

I mis-spell

I notice that while trying to write out a notice to post on the elevator walls to tell people that a local cafe will be open for dinner on christmas day, in my trying to write out the message, i had to also talk to the desk man about his allergies and to also talk to the three other residents, of my senior home, i mis-spelled a word, i do not *do* multitasking well!.
   this got me to thinking.  I live in the deep south.  was not long ago that an 8th grade education was *quite* enough to get a nice job with.  the next county over, i read that the illiteracy rate is over fifty percent!
[they clap for joy when their schools are rated a "D" for this year !   "much better than the "F" of last year!]

Over there in that county, it is who you love and who loves you, that really Count!
[I once met a man here who did not know his left from his right, betcha there are many many more people, here,  who do not know!]
I have heard enough Northerners who run their soul-engines without Oil: no feelings!  all mind and little heart.  How many IQ 140 college professors, here at the local university, are bitter, cynical, sarcastic?!

so i mis-spelled a word.  so what?!  not here in the South, anyways.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

school shooting: the 500 lb Gorilla

the school shooting:  the 500 lb Gorilla !

well today I was walking down a quiet tallahassee street and someone, just one man, in a car, mocked me with a yelling cussword, as he sped by at 40 mph!
   This reminded me of my 1994 Hometown in very rural upstate new york.  I used to walk the county and state roads, for a hike.  by he end of the third year, i figured that I would get one or two catcalls per *mile*, from passing motorists!  Why one man actually got out of his car and was going to attack me, but changed his mind!!

Violence against people.  Not just a 20 year old man shooting up 30 people either!  this is a "long hallway"!    at one end of this hallway are the people who commit mass murders of innocents.  near the middle are lessor crimes like rape or home invasions.  at the other far end, *still* in this hallway, are the bullyings, the tauntings, the wife batterings, the child sex, and verbal abuse of spouse, kids, elders!
  Taking away guns will not work: here in florida last week a social worker visited a known violent parolee, after the interview he came running out of the house with a meat cleaver and slashed her to bits!!

Most of us are Guilty, to some degree.
[Even some of my grade school 3rd...6th grade bullyers might even be reading this, on my facebook page!]

   have you put down gay people?   disliked blacks?  disliked whitey?
taunted a kid with buck teeth, in grade school?   a boss from hell? a bitter old man?    control freak of other people?
Guilty!     you belong to the Club, that assault rife, the school shooter used, is over the mantle of the fireplace!  You took out your Issues onto other people!!

So here we have this 500 pound Gorilla at the end of a teeter-totter board.
nothing on the other end.  500 to 0.
Seems obvious to me that even if we try, and i read that the liberal left wants to *really* turn all boys into Girls!  "no Agressions, no violence"
"consensus reality".    no one gets hurt.  soon dresses for men and hose for their bare legs!  play with dolls and be gentle and nurturing and nourishing.
[any policeman or school guard might tell you that two women fighting is "no holds barred", extremely the most violent!   nearly any janitor will tell you that the graffiti on the womans bathroom walls is much more cuss-wordy than the men's room wall next door!]

there would thus seem that even if we reduce the weight of this Gorilla to, say 100 pounds, it is still 100 to 0.

what we need is a Counterbalance!    something on the other end of the board to balance against this monster gorilla!

ethics.  morals. real spiritual teachings and experiences.
This beginning in school and in the home.  place these far above the "ABCs and math"!    a good SAT score is NOT a given for a civilized graduate!

in fact here I lay the blame on the Liberal left!
one of the basic beliefs of theirs, it seems: all ways are valid, all paths have heart.  no one belief is better than any other belief.
see where this leads, people?!  you Better!!   the school shooting guy is *JUST* as valid in his acted out beliefs as any other belief system and he had the guts to do it!!
---this is the result, as I see it, of this philosophy!

[this here freestone cringes as i say this, here it comes.....]:  what we all and each need is a sytem of *Absolutes* in the belief system department.
we should begin with the Greek/Roman Ideals.  The Renaissance too.
all underlined by the New testament statements and the ten commandments.
At the center should be Jesus and his teachings, and for the older souls, the mystic Christianity!
these teachings must begin in the homes and are the center-teachings in each school grade and in college too!
"broken families" should be avoided.
Real Asylums for the mental problem people too, many many of them, open campuses for healing, protection and learning.  there are many of us who cannot "help" our schizophrenic genes.  there should be safe homes for these people to live good lives in.

otherwise.....these sort of outbursts will continue and probably increase in number, in the years ahead.

so far, the "Gorilla" is the only game in town That Counts!
the more "gentle" Gorillas "merely" become CEOs that milk us all of money or factory Lords who mis-use their workers.  or college professors who put the individual learnings of the students, *last*!  politics and backstabbing of other professors come first!

soon all elephants will become extinct as 57,836 poachers get all the tusks.
yet MORE violence to life.  and to the liberal left's relativeness theory of morals, this act of non=morals is just as valid as any other act of morals.


Tuesday, December 04, 2012

me, freestone

me, freestone by freestone
me, freestone, a photo by freestone on Flickr.

me, freestone

I uploaded this shot just for to be able to send this image to a
pen-pal friend. december 4th, 2012.
suddenly I am 71 years old. I do not feel "old"!

fire at the setting!

fire at the setting! by freestone
fire at the setting!, a photo by freestone on Flickr.

fire at the setting!

exactly at sunset, looking to the southwest, here in Tallahassee, florida, usa.

orange fungus growing out of a tree.

orange fungus growing out of a tree.

looks scary eh? its one of those central tree-trunk fungus that loves rotten wood and this is its "mushroom". looks very abstract.

tallahassee, forida, usa.