Wednesday, September 16, 2009

another homeless man!

today from the bus window I saw yet the same homeless man.   He wore a faded green suit jacket, I have seen Him now for about three months and all of this time he wears only this jacket, no matter if the temp is 95 degrees.
today, from the passing bus window, i saw him rummaging through the trash can, like of a few days ago, he rummaged through several to find a cigarette butt.
    He came into Borders a few days ago, at the coffee shop area, walked right in and then came over to sit down with me, as "they" usually do, the homeless.  I tried to talk to him, but the schizophrenia, i guess prevented him.  He rolled his fingers in a *certain* way to indicate that he needed  money for a smoke, I gave to him a dollar and he RAN out and over to the CVS to buy some cigarettes.

I got to thinking about him, a bit.  I have heard him shake his fists at the drivers on the street, I have seen him walk around angry and dejected.

How could I Pet this Porcupine?   be all too too easy for anyone, for me too, to judge him badly.  but suppose that his childhood was a childhood from hell and no other relatives were around.  compared to his childhood, right now he is in "heaven", free from all of the crap!
   then at age 22, his schizophrenia kicks in!

Yes, I have wondered maybe someone could take him in as "their child" an Raise him, but probably this would utterly not work at ALL, as then he would not be Free!

In my senior home, today, I talked to several people about a Bag Lady, from new York city, who I once saw at a bus stop with her bags and I told her about the senior home and then she told me that she HATED it there!  "too too far off of the ground" she says.  She then told me that she lived on the 2nd floor.  "I GOT to have my feet on the ground, sleep ON the ground", she barks to me!  Then she told me that also she hated it there because there were too too many people there.  [150 in the building]
The several people recalled this lady.   Someone told me that she and most of the other homeless people CHOOSE to be homeless this way as then they are Free!
no one tells them what to do, believe in;  no social games to play, no child support or no taxes and headaches over "relatives", etc...etc.

[funny....the only freedom that I can find, in life, is when I, in free will, *commit* to something, the very act of free choice then self sealingly removes the freedom, if one *must* be free, then that is Bondage to this freedom!]

Thus any "help" is rejected out of hand as "help" = someone to tell you how to live, what to do, what to believe!


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