Saturday, February 15, 2003

the fat lady Sings and waddles!!

Yesterday at the caferteria, i saw something that got my Attention really good: there was a booth near me and a very very fat lady struggled to get up and leave her meal. waddle, waddle, i could see that she weighed about 350 lbs and her ankles were shot. she could barely get around, barely get out of this booth!
I heard the "peanut gallery" scold......"surely surely she could eat one less cookie a day and lose 50 lbs, surely she knows her weight is killing her slowly!"

suddenly i remembered what a Guide said, speaking through a medium, telling the class about "past lives and karma"....telling this class about a person who was very overweight and was so because he starved to death in a past life!

There and then i had a small "movie in my mind"! I saw some nameless tribe in Old Africa, near the sahara desert, a place where FAMINES are as common as rain in England! I saw in my theater-mind, a person who lived ten adult years eating *just* enough to only delay starvation-to-death! ten years of being very very *very* hungry, and dying of starvation in the end. every moment of each and every day was filled with a deep deep physical hunger for food food food food foood! a burning gnawing of a hungerpang that never ended.

and the life after that one too....
and the next life, also!......

once, when i moved back to tallahassee, i looked all through the want ads, daily, for a place to rent while i was crashing with friends: took me several weeks to rent an apt. But i noted that once i found a place to rent, each and every time that i picked up the Democrat newspaper, i immediately went to the want ads: took me another week before i stopped looking....takes the ole basketball several bounces, before it stops, after i stop dribbling it!
too, i once was out of jam for a week, and once i bought a jar of jam..... why the next time i went back to Publix, to buy something, why i bought another jar of jam! and the *next* time i was there, i bought yet another....eventually i had five jars of jam in my cupboard, as each and every time that i went to buy something, the memory OF "I AM OUT OF JAM" WAS STILL THERE!!

Thus i imagined a hunger that went on each and every minute for ten years...wake up hungry, go to bed hungry, die of hunger! never never eat enough even when food was there!

I really then thought about that term "overcorrection"
like in "thesis, antithesis, synthesis"...or perhaps how if i shoot an arrow at the target and miss by a foot to the left, i will overshoot, to the right on my next shot!

so.Just what would five lives in a row of an all consuming HUNGER do to *this* life, a life where food is availible everywhere and at everytime and the $$$$$$ to buy nearly anything?!

gotta overcorrect! a hunger that is so so deep and being full is not an option to even slow down!
one has to overcorrect, perhaps, in ONE lifetime, or else take 20 lives more just to slowly work it out "rationally"! In other words, this 350 lb lady could be working out 20 lifetimes, where she would not have to incarnate on earth for 20 lives, by weighing 350+ lbs, NOW in this life!

thus i really now have an Issue with the Food Police that rail against our overweight society! we, who need to, NEED to overeat: just HOW else can the extreme "right end" be balanced?!
I now know that there are people out there who starved to death in many lives in succession and that memory is deep deep in the bodysoul!
thus......when i now see a person get on the bus and this bus tips sideways about three inches: that person has a cane as his ankles and knees are near-gone, i can well see that he may actually *NEED* to gain another 80 lbs! gotta overcorrect a profoundl overbalance: d-e-p-r-i-v-a-t-i-o-n!

thus, if a "food moralist" would "force" her to lose weight, and without her UNDERSTANDINGS of the process of "why" she was overweight, why she *might* have to incarnate that 20 more lives and that food policeman might have to incarnate those 20 lives with her, as he RUINED the soul-lesson for her, by getting her to diet-without-her-understandings, spiritually, of the process as to why she was overweight!!