Tuesday, May 14, 2002

weblog entry....

tis tuesday, the 13th, of May, now. Tis the day after my DreamVisit to India, the astral place in India where the SEERER foretells that i have a year to live!

I slowly slowly get a feel for even the very Questions to ask of my self and my Self and of Spirit, about this!
Will take days and even weeks to feel out these questions!!
for what i will do in the next year, may not only be Important for me and others, in my "goodbye finale", on earth; but for my life-to-come, in the Spiritworld, after i die! probably MUCH more important for me in the spirit, afterdeath, world!

AT the same day, after my dream, there were several replies in my mailbox from a List that i belong to , in response to a post that i put there the day before my Dream: this post of my weblog journal was of my Lament about how all of my friends Have Parted from me, and what i know and SEE [afterlife visions] , they have no idea, thus they tend to Mock me
or criticize me....makes for a alone road, for me!

the replies in my mailbox from this list....is that
some people invite me to essentually come join with them and live with their community! they are all older souls who Understand my "Pain"!
---QUITE an offer to "put under my hat", to pray and ponder upon...shall i or shall i not?!!

Last night, as i rode back to my trailer on the city bus, i watched the people on the bus and i had sort of a Messege from spirit, an Intuition that was more of a REMINDER than of an actual messege: but a messege never the less. this "reminder" was partly to recall what i once wrote, as one of my "Experiences" years ago, and have put it on file. I was reminded of the MEANING, for me, of this article that i wrote.
before i can continue on, in my journal letter, i MUST requote the entire article and i do so below. then i will continue writing this letter.

the article..my letter continues after this article!
kids draw

I live in a very small Upstate New York town. Very
The Grade school playground looks out onto the corn
fields...pine trees
flank one side of it.
I often walk out to this playground, after supper;
there, i can see the
open sky and smell
the fresh air.

Here it was September...school had been in session
only a week or so.
The tennis court had just been paved with nice fresh
tar only a week ago,
and none of the lines or
netting had been replaced yet. I walked over to
it...i could see how nice
and pure black it was.

But on this evening's walk, i could see some markings
upon the tar.
I could see, as i came near ...chaulk drawings on it.
I took a closer look..
Yes------some very creative second grade teacher had
just that afternoon,
taken her class
outdoors, on this nice day----and she marked off
six-foot squares, in
chaulk. Then she gave
each kid a handfull of colored chaulk....and then
assigned them all to the
fresh black pavement.
One square per kid; to draw a drawing and sign their

Now, here, i came across the 7 pm result, of this
Drawings.i could see---- maybe thirty colored
drawings. One per student.

MY!...what a difference between them! Some were drawn

with great care
and of great talent...some were done in haste...and
some drawings were only
of a cuss-word or two, and maybe some sharp angry
jagged lines. A social
might call these angry kids "dysfunctional"!

And----i recognized most of the last names. These
were the Children of
all the
townspeople...people that i grew up with.

As i stood admiring a couple of Very talented
drawings...done by some
of my relative's children....
---A Spiritual inspiration came to me!!

---As if these children were the SOULS of the
townspeople, and what was
drawn out, was an
expression of the Quality of these Souls! ---as if
the whole of their years
of living their lives,
were summerized, somehow, in these drawings!
I took this analogy further....

In second grade, one is learning how to draw...after

all, kids are
kids!----half-ripe fruit can only
HINT at the fullness of the taste, of its
ripeness-to-come, in time.
They WILL make mistakes!
Ya learn art..or life....by doing.
One earns how to Draw..by the very act of drawing.

Same as with life!
No one will "go to Hell'..for their sins or mistakes.

We are Artists....on
the lower levels of
spirit..Learning How To Draw. Someday..we all will
to becoming , I guess..what the Bible says..."to
become Co-creators, with
God...in his
heaven celestial, with Him"!!

But right now....we are just beginning.
We must be free to try anything!
Do anything!
It is "OK"!! It is ok to make mistakes and to "mess
up" the drawings! If
feedback-from-life, is
needed---life will, in due time, supply this------as
Soul reality
follows laws and rules--Spiritual laws and rules.
Many call these rules..."KARMA"!....or, "dharma.
Thus, if mistakes are made..life, itself, will give
to us some feedback.

So---we all ought to become as creative as
must be the very at the very heart of what constitutes

"one's Soul"!

so there. that is what i wrote, back in the early 90s.
The "bus-reminder" refers to this article. I consider myself an old old soul. been told so by spirit, over and over. As i sat on the bus, i could see that all of the people on it were very young in soul, like as if i were a "5th grader" in the 2nd grade of the school of earthly life! good grief! here i am "into" Calculus math, and the kids around me are only barely able to "add and subtract" let alone do "algebra", the prerequsite to Calculus!! THIS is why all my friends cannot Know and understand me or my Ideas! they, while older than the young souls, probably are only in "3rd" grade!

Spirit has often told me that after i die, i will be working with the people of the younger soul-age, in the spirit worlds. meaning: MOST of us, most of humanity!
most of the people on the earth, at this time, are young to middle age souls!
THIS is why, i was told, on the bus, that during my last year here on earth, i would be very very good if i remove, within myself, all traces of "bias" and "predujice" and resentments against those people around me who are "dumber" or more immature, or more "redneck-like" than myself! all of the people on that bus will become old souls some incarnational day, in other lives. right now, they are Learning How To Live, by Doing, by making many many mistakes, some of them bad ones!
thus, i probably WILL continue to live amoungst them
and to make sure that i forgive them all for doing things that i might not approve of! I am supposed to, spirit tells me, to become one of the angelic helpers that aid and help heal....these younger souls, when they die and come to heaven and enter the Centers
of healings and Soul-advancements.
i BEST not have any "judgemental bias", as i counsul/console these souls...as all that they did on earth was just beginning lessons, lessons that I once had, when i was once a young soul like they!
---and some day, each of them could become a "5th grader"!
a father sends his kids off to a Private Boarding high school, the kids learn lessons that the father may not Approve of, but he Loves them all just the same: he knows that they need to try *anything* that they desire [even THAT!!], as that is the only way that lessons are learned, by doing.

thus what i might better do, is to continue to live
amoungst the younger souls, in this city of 300,000.
to NOT "go up into the mountains with like-kindred
[an archtype here, folks...during one's last year on earth, one is "supposed" to retire to the monestary in the mountains, in order to "get up to speed", in the preparation for heaven: to saturate onself in the vibrations of the oldest souls possible, around him, that he can be near! to Share, and to recieve, Wisdom and teachings...]
---to not accept this offer, to "do the exact opposite"
of what i "am supposed to do", in order to follow
the Path that spirit laid out for me, BEFORE i was born!

for i will Work in the Office [one of the workers]
of Jesus. Jesus went to talk to the Woman
prostitute at the well of Samarera: he got flack from that, from his friends as they thought this lady was well beneath Jesus, an unsalvageable sinner.

so i ask of you all....if Manderville is right and 20% to 80% of the earth's population may die in some great earthchange, within the next few years and
tens of millions of souls all arrive in heaven at once,
WHO is going to aid, console, direct, the POOR and the HOMELESS, there, in heaven?!
i do NOT mean the earthly poor and the earthly homeless, here, what i mean are those people who arrive in heaven with NO or LITTLE spiritual life, little soul development! they spent all of their lives in material persuits and gave not a thought to the afterlife and the Implications of it!
---that Lawyer who takes advantage of his clients.
---the manager of a fast food resturant who works 120 hours a week at it.
---the lady who gets her divorce and ruins her "ex's"
life over the Settlement, making bitter enimies of his family in doing so.
---the mentality behind everyone who SPAMS all those
e-mail ads that you get!

you Know them: young souls. may have an IQ of 140 and a college professor, but know nothing of heaven at all.

WHO is gonna hold their hands when they come to heaven?! Jesus and the Masters will need all the help that they can get, If Edgar cayce/Manderville is right!!

the cadre of angelic helpers, that is who!

---so i might very well just live out my final year
with the "masses" of the young souls, with NO ONE to share my experiences with, as I Am In Training to become one of the healers for these younger-than-me, souls, after they arrive into the heavens. To forgive them, accept them, understand them in terms of THEIR understandings, their way, so to KNOW their lives after death.
---for all these "rednecks" will become old souls one day, just as i was once a redneck just like them, in lives lived long ago!