Monday, September 10, 2001

the lady from CARD, the center for Autism Research and Development, came by the library today to take my picture for their site.
"the adult high level functioning autistic using the Computer"....or something like that.
we got to talking about people who are highly gifted AND labor under some mental disability!
they get hit upon in many many different ways, i saw.....

-----obviously, their disability! No one takes them seriously!! can you imagine a lawyer, in court, presenting his case, with a autistic voice-tone and a drawl of speech, with a "different" way of thinking?! or a CEO of a company who is always about 13% out of sync
with the social way of bondings with his other CEO officepeople?!

but there is yet more!
-----people dump their "need-loops" upon them! If a parent, friend or teacher needs a scapegoat or someone to have "below' them, on the pecking order, in order for themselves to feel somewhat "ok", why this autistic person takes the hit!
-----and, if this autistic person has some challanging idea, why if he is "autistic" then that means he is a bit crazy and thus his threatening idea, as well as himself, need not be taken seriously!!
this autistic person can make all kinds of suggestions for improvement, say, in a company: no one takes him seriously, no one believes him. he just does not count!!

In my case, i guess, whatever and whenever that i begin to talk about my heaven vision experiences, why people begin to look at their watches or change the subject or ignore me.
suppose i wear some clothes like i was some cult member leader, with a kind of "charasmatic" hairdo and clothes makeover?
suppose i had a "golden-tone" of a voice?
suppose i acted like i had money and sex-power?

I have NONE of the above, raggy clothes that never can be washed in anything but baking soda, a voice that drags on real slow and
a gawky clumsy manner with not a trace of "sex appeal' in my clothes or manner! no money either!!
Perhaps i was KILLED in a past life, for my beliefs or for what i did....the middle ages are littered with the burnt corpses
of the heretics, who died merely because they offended the Church! I will not be killed THIS time: thus my visions of the afterlife seem more for ME, than for anyone else!

but i have great sympathy for all the various "disabled" out there, as i feel that they are done to like what i wrote above!

------and the homeless??
no wonder they offen are so so angry all the time: all help given to them has twenty strings attached, like "help" must have Prozac come with it, or no help! or that fast food place on main street that had for several years a sign that said..."no one can stay here for longer than 40 minutes"! the homeless know for whom that sign is meant for!!
basicly: the anger is because everyone wants them to change to THEIR ways of living, to change in every way the homeless: make the homeless feel NOT OK, have them feel that anything and everything that they feel, believe, and do, is worthless!!
thus if worthless: change to our way of being.....the "straight" way........