Thursday, July 26, 2001

oh i love to ride the bus for this reason alone: provides a school for Character Observations!

this here Lady yesterday....she sat near me and she ran her mouth constantly about how much she disliked Tallahassee so so so much!
[i have a small hobby, one hobby out of 53,185 hobbies----Why Do Some people hate Tallahassee so Much?!] she had been living in this city for only six months and she came from south florida.
By her own admission, she ranted to the guy next to her about how she came here to deal with her disfunctional crazy relatives and she had her own crazyness too, and her painfull life of Insanity and Schizophrenia.

{WAS she the lady that wandered up and down the streets one day with her fist in the air, shouting out loud her anger, to the crows and the pigeons?!!]

I thought about how a Compass needle will point to "north", the needle is attracted to the Pole. people who have a disturbed soul will seek out and draw to them the very mirror of that soul...
"like attacts like" is an Ancient Phrase".....

here, this lady draws to her lots of also disturbed people and the "crows squack to each other"...crows do not attract Robins or mockingbirds! Woodpeckers sing only to other Woodpeckers....Finches warble only to other finches.

I sense that if this lady can change herself, then her whole world will change! but tis very hard, as that
pain IS out there, IS real: one can see Social Injustice at each and every Glance of the eyes and mind.
the vast Meadows of Real sufferings where people muck over people....each and every grass blade, in that field, is
some shit that is out there, in the city, some Real Injustice, some Real Occurance where "redneckness" is at work! if you have a pair of scissors, why you can bend down and snip away, one blade at a time: the field will grow more grass-blades behind your back---erternity is patient and the Field is Vast!!

"Pain Is Real..thus it must be embraced"....i see has trapped many a they kick that tar baby REAL hard, perhaps the more pain they have, the more aware and intense a counsciousness they have!
"pain is life", then, perhaps, for these people........

I have a Question, for myself, for would a Counselor, here, or in the afterlife, be able to Offer something else to these People-of-Pain?! something that is not of pain, but something that they can accept as being real!
anything that is NOT of pain, is perhaps like "the color orange" to a orange-colorblind person, to them! "life IS pain....there IS nothing else that is real". they might say that, to this counselor! thus after death they may go to where there is ONLY pain, unless this process can be interupted. but should one even interupt it?! I am not a "master"! I do not Know.....

so this yesrerday's bus lady....would not matter WHAT city she lives in, her soul mirrors into something everywhere....she finds what she wants, and it Justifies her stance, her belief system. if she talked to me, no doubt she is a Master at this: she would find my "buttons" and surely i would soon rapport with her about how "tallahassee [and life] is a-w-f-u-l-l!! she would get her Meal, her Food, from me, no matter what i would feebly try to tell her, about how "life is amazing, wonderfull, interesting"! Soon, i would just become another "crow" squacking to her "crowness"! and she would WIN! as she, like others i have known, would go away Satisfied, her Reality Reinforced:life IS a fucking Bitch! and they get what they want!