well well well, as i walked into my senior home for independent living, my Worst Help nightmare came up to me to ask for help. A man who has had many strokes and does things like bring the soup for the pot luck dinner *in* a plastic grocery bag.
[not "wrapped in" but *in* a plastic bag, like he was bring a goldfish in water.]
the local paper had an article about two Buddhist retreat sites and he wanted me to help him on the upstairs dial up computer as he says, "they do not just come up"!
--imagine you being lead into the operating room and the surgeon hands you the scalpel and he says, I am going golfing, the patient is ready for the tumor removal at the base of his brain"!
--imagine walking into the cockpit of the 747 plane and the stewardess says that it is ready for takeoff and the
junior captain is sick so you have to take it off and fly it by yourself!
......this is his computer knowledge.
took a bit for him to *discover* that one needs to double click to open a shortcut to google on the desktop.
["it just does not come up"!!]
a half hour of Total Frustration, on my part.
at 35k per second, dialup speed, at that!!
I managed to find two of his sites and there are many links and fanpages too. two google windows open.
he can hardly use the "open in a new window" thingee either and when he does, he is clueless as to how
to find this page he opened.
so here I am, a sports car trying to drive, on a road where the speed limit is about 1/100th of a mile per hour, maybe 300 foot PER DAY!!
[i read how parades ruin cars as that slooooow speed overheats everything, as these cars slowly go along, in the parade.]
here again i realize that while his heart is in a good place, there is little that i can do with him or for him except do it ALL *for* him! my way. then give to him my results my way and my own interpretations, my own reviews and comments. he be a pudding and i am the sauce.
---he is totally lost.
as i left him in the computer room, i suggested he call those phone numbers, in the article.
probably i would then have to walk *with* him over using a phone too!
behind this man will soon be 10,000,000 more, the baby boomers getting older.
and...a "saint Teressa", and there are those people, even here in this building, will spend most of every single day every day of the month caring for someone. the helper's own life does not even exist.
I once talked to a neighbor over the man down the street. he told me that in that 150 year old house lived a man and his mother and this man has spent his ENTIRE LIFE caring for his disabled mother.
she now is 95 and he is 80. the catholic church down the street considers him a living saint. His whole life, no outside interests at all, just devoted to her.
the man, even here in this building, who Cares, why he has, for the last year, gone to spend most of the day caring for another resident. I never see him except for when he comes down for church and i do not ever go as the perfumes bother my copd.
so I see that i will have to be "the bad guy" and not help this computer total illiterate man.
I utterly lack the patience too.
"just right mouse click to bring up the menu to open in a new window".
"right mouse click?"
"open in a new window"?
"why does nothing get typed in the google box when i type"?
"hey", i tell him, "a "-" is not a "_" when entering a name"!!
"you got to double-click to open a desktop icon".
click.....[three seconds]......click.....[two seconds]....."hey, you must click-click, like that"!
click.....three seconds....click...two seconds.....scowls.
[again] double...click, "click click".
poor guy. takes him two hours to eat a meal. 20 minutes to walk 100 foot.
I have sympathy, but there comes a point where i give up.