Monday, July 07, 2003

My friend, who is an ASTROLOGER, tells me "that for the next few months, I will be busy busy with Personal Care!

Saturn going over my natal sun!

whether he is right or not: more and more of my time is being consumed with "stuff"!
---applying for social security, the medical exam at the veterans center: *that* means
they WILL find lots of things to test me on and that means that I will have to spend one day per visit and their could be many many visits!
---landlord sells to developers, the only option. now, is to move to the "towers"!
"old folks "homes"...those government subsidized living assisted large large apartments, usually in the form of 20 story towers.
"shufflecourts on premises"!
takes a day to apply to each one!

so if I do not post anything for days and days and days: I have NOT croaked!
There will be many many days at a time when I will not be able to type one word, in my journal!!

62 years old!
truly, I can see whey the seniors tend to be conservative!

MANAGEMENT TAKES OVER!!

any time of growth, has it where management must take over and become the governing force!
---look at your e-mail! soon, very soon, after you have your account for awhile, you must spend an entire session just to manage your mail!
---any growth of many leaves, on a plant, must have a time for the dead wood to also grow, so that the tree can be supported from below: all growth and no management....is "CANCER"!
---another analogy: the big city sprawl! All that growth must have it where soon the city management must take control of the unzoned growth!

so, soon, I imagine, as I am 62, I will have to become a "Puritan"!!
Suppose the vet clinic tells me that my colesteriol is high: no more fats and no more deserts! or that I have to give up Starbucks! No coffee or sweets!
probably I will have a Colestomey[sp], soon .....this is where they insert that long probe up the whole length of the large intestine! Suppose they find CANCER!
...yet MORE "life denials" will occur: heavy chemotherapy's!! Probably I will end up weighing 115 lbs at 6' 2"!!
well....not *that8 extreme, probably.....but I can see it coming:
"puritanism" for me...tra la, tra la!!

I grit my teeeth when I hear that phrase...."Eventually we each have to give up Everything, one by one. Our favorite foods, our neighborhood home, our loved ones: in the End, each of us is alone and staring at the wall or looking vacantly out of the window"!
I can also see that for many people: *this* is what finally drives them to seek Religion!

Yes, in four to nine months, I will be living in a senior Tower, a six month, or more, waiting list. If the prophecy is overwritten!!

the trick of Acceptance...is to make the best of any environment. I will try to get to know many seniors, there, and to maybe help a few with their e-mailing. But I might be able to have an internet connection of my own, but maybe not: if not, I will post to my journal even less!

yes 62 years old