Monday, August 20, 2001

I note, from a couple of my entries, that i sometimes seem to be a bit "preachy"!

I think i know why.......
Seems that most of what i have known and experienced, over the years, seems to fit no one's mold, no one's accepted way of life!
thus whatever i say, would offend someone!! so i am always in "reaction-mode", trying to "defend"!!
take my Visions of the afterlife. one could maybe assume that the Christian church people would be overjoyed at reading my accounts. i have found that NOT to be the case! ABSOLUTELY not!! most of them get vey *very* upset as my experiences of the afterlife DO Not Appear On Their Map of "The Way It Is Suppossed To be"! they come back at me with anger or pity as I "obviously" am a tool for Satan as any perception of the heavens must not really be of THEIR heavens, it obviously must be of hell!
thus i am always trying to "defend" my position and i always lose lose, as they can outtalk me in speed and wordyness everytime!

---and the new agers??
I have heard the sound of shattering glass manyatimes as i happen to mention that i love roast beef for dinner!
in order for me to be accepted in THEIR camp, i must fit their pattern 101%! I deeply offended one person when i told him that i was allergic to the incense that he was burning over in the corner and would you please put it out until i leave! He became all upset and told me "how dare you tell me that my most spiritual symbol you find intolerable"! ah...but bronchial and lungs are physical and he lived in his head, over this matter...MUST i have had to dig out my medical record of the 20 days in the hospital near death with Empyma/pnumonia due to fume exposure five years before AND that two weeks in the Air force with Chemical-induced Bronchitis: must i show him my Veteran's 60% disability-pension papers?! i did not as i knew it would not do a lick of good!!
"Incense is Spiritual=Truth" is engraved in his brain!! mere facts do not sway!
Actually, i have much much more in common with the "materialists" who shop and consume as they are royally growing their souls
with Tools boughten-----tools to use in their spiritual growth, and "spiritual growth", to me, means 50% spirit and 50% earthly, TOGETHER as one, at the same time and space!

so i "preach" a bit.
but no one hears me or listens to me. nor do i expect them to. "Heaven' is like "gravity"...you do not have to believe in it, but it is still there for you! you will arrive whether you believe in the afterlife or not, your subscription to "this" religion or "that" path, matters not!
the only thing that matters is the proper completion of "level 1", completing the Quests on level one, the physical world, before leveling up to the next level, and there are many many levels ahead of level number 2, also! after levelup, then your Points can be alloted into Characteristics and Talants, there, in the afterlife. sounds like a computer Role-playing game doesn't it? I play rpgs a lot, now i am on "Ultima IX".....think "daggerfall" or "Baldur's gate"....whatever Talants you work on here will mean the corressponding afterlife Stats will be leveled up and the additional earned points can be alloted to these stats.
Nothing to do with religion or paths....think "computer rpg" and leveling up! If you only "hate" or be "negative", herenow, you will be able to only Increase THOSE talants to even greater strengths, there, after death!